Thoughts that written by ordinary woman who has been through lots in her life. There are the ups, the downs and the hurdles, but I manage. Through all that, I just lay my life to God. For the fun parts, I love dancing ( hip hop, street and LA style ), books, movies, eating, food, and just sleep!

Saturday, November 28, 2009


Things come and go
Some things they are kept for years, some just last for days, months
People come and go
Some stay with me, some gone...

When things are not going as I want them to be. It is sad but the only best thing I can do is be grateful of what I have now.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Making It Come True

Success starts from a dream. Now I have dreams, loads of them. But, as they always say, to be successful, can't just dream it, but need to do it. And that's I'm doing right now. It seems a very,very,very long road, bet it's going to be a bumpy ride. I'm not afraid and I'm taking it one step at a time.

Wishing myself a luck

Monday, November 23, 2009

Another One...

When I'm reading articles about letting go, denial and anything that will help to go through this letting go process.

I often complain how my life is unfair, how difficult it is just let him go, how he always has the right thing to say or to do to get what he wants and many more. I thought that time I was able to let go him, yes....but not 100%. And I'm not ready for it. The worse thing he knows I'm not ready and he takes advantage for it. Yet, I'm still foolishly in love with him.

As for work, it's not come easy as well. I faced some failures, although I have accepted the truth and being grateful that I have learned a valuable lesson. All the failures make me learn, make me to be more prepared for the next challenge in life. However, sometimes, I'm still sad why I didn't make it.

But when I was browsing, I found this interesting quote :

Life is not a success-only journey. You're going to get beat up along the way

This make me realize, nothing comes easy. Although I have overcome bitter moments, passed
( what seems ) the tests in life, and when I thought I have succeeded and there won't be more obstacles...I was wrong.....

It's journey full of struggle,tears, sacrifice, happiness, laughter, sorrow,joy until the time is come to meet the creator of life, God. It's like a game, once succeed to first level, up to the next level until the whole levels finish.

Now, I know..I'm going to be up along the way and all the obstacles in life are nothing beside my "ammunition" to keep fighting in this life.


These days I'm aware at this moment I'm on denial and this has been cycling through my life. The facts are there in front of my eyes. He has shown himself of what he is. Yet, I'm still standing here waiting in certainty. I'm not accepting the truths and the worse part is I haven't been able letting him go.

The more I try to let go, the more I grow hopes of him and the more I'm running back to him.
Be honest, I'm frustrated with this kind of feeling.
I know holding on to him, always running to him it's nothing but hurt me more. I know that!!! But how to let go? How do I stop from denying things ?

I have made peace with him, I have forgiven him for all the pain he caused. But when I forgave him, I love him more...Oh My God!!!

When I have the courage, the strength to let go...he always knows what to say or what to do.
How cruel is that?

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

It was...

Everyday text without absence
Phone calls, your voice is like water in oasis
Flowers and stuffs...treated me like a princess
You are
But it was then..

Now, there's no more of that
Seems that we go to the different path

I can only pray, when your heart will open, your eyes will see...

Sunday, November 15, 2009

And Then A Hero Comes Along

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast the fears aside
And you know you can survive

So when you feel like the hope is gone
Look inside and be strong
That you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

A beautiful lyric from Mariah Carey "Hero"